orglearn.org

Bullying and abuse can occur in many ways. Common complaints are; being yelled at, being denigrated in front of others, name calling, constant joking about an individual, personal verbal attacks in private, isolation through ignoring someone and threats of sanctions or penalties. Extremely serious situations can escalate to physical contact, work sabotage – often in the form of overloading the victims with tasks and the setting of unreasonable deadlines, allocating faulty equipment and of course blocking promotions of competent workers.

Things you should not do if you are being bullied

Starting a get even campaign by trying to secretly sabotage the bully or employing physical violence to counteract verbal attacks. It can also be counter productive trying to enlist the sympathy and help of inappropriate co-workers as in my experience often onlookers will pretend support as they enjoy watching the demise of either the bully or the one being bullied.

Things you should do to counteract an office bully

The first issue is to take the stance that its not your fault. I know this sounds obvious (and perhaps difficult) however some people I have met in my career seem to internalize the problem and blame themselves for what happens and live, or just exist, with a victim’s mentality. If you take this view of life it will be hard to overcome the injustice that is being inflicted upon you. You have to overcome negative feelings and realize that you are entitled to be how you want to be, feel how you would like to feel and that no one has the right to attack your feelings or try to diminish your sense of self worth. Employers have the right to judge your work in relation to their needs however no one has the right to question your values, feelings and emotions. If you need a strategy to get you started on a more positive outlook read something (or go to a course on) “affirmations” and/or “positive self talk”. Two things to remember here, they are clichés however they are true: “the most important words you will ever hear are the words you say to yourself about yourself when you are by yourself” and that “insanity is doing the same thing every time and expecting a different result”. You must using whatever means you can put real effort into either developing (or maintaining) your positive self image,

Many will advise you to enlist support of co-workers, this however as I said previously can be dangerous. You must report the bullying  behavior to the appropriate internal or external authorities. To do this you will need to keep a record of the incidents, even as I suggested in a recent tweet go to the lengths of recording your conversations with the bully. You must document your positive work outcomes particularly if someone in a position of power is taking credit for your work. You need to get support by going to your human resources department and/or any organization in your area set up to help with these situations. Often institutions such as social services or other quasi legal entities exist to handle these types of situations. If no improvement is forthcoming you must have the courage to take formal legal action. I realize that taking a formal approach to the bullying will put your job in jeopardy however letting yourself be bullied is a slippery slope of misery that can end in disaster.

There is also some interesting perspectives and positive outcome examples at:

http://abcnews.go.com/Business/WorkingWounded/story?id=468009

Before you go to read their advice its wise to remember if all else fails you may end up by changing employers. If you need to do that here is a resume example to get you started on your new direction. I certainly however hope you do not need to use it because of being bullied. Changing jobs is a drastic action however you need to realize you deserve to work in a reasonable environment and this will sometimes mean you need to find an employer with a more positive work culture where bullying is not tolerated.